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mylife mystyle recent perks
remember those times
rommies of my life
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schnook timeout - Episode 6 (pre-Labour Day special) ____________________________________________________ Boy: You are pregnant.
Girl: No. Boy: Yes, all women are pregnant. Tomorrow is Labour Day! Girl: . . . (courtesy of KUKU) Cupcakes ____________________________________________________ I should be studying right now. But I sooo happened to bum into Betty Crockers webbie and I found super nice looking cupcakes. They seemed to be telling me "I'm delicious, eat me now.", "Bake me, and you can enjoy me". They really look super good and fattening. Haiz, should I learn to make them? Actually I only like the ample frosting, which I did not know how to make. According to the recipe, I could get Betty Crockers Frosting in a tub. Mmmm.. But I wanna learn how to make frosting.
 yummy!!  yummy!!  yummy!! S U P P O R T ____________________________________________________ All I wished is that you can give me more support.. . . . But you never did. From the first day I met you, you never support in any of my decisions. Everything that I had decided upon, you'll say it's not good. Say I am childish, I did not care about what you think. You had made me think that I am not good enough for anything. You never believe in me. . You never supported me in anything I do. Even though you knew that I love something and willing to give my all. You starting building barriers to prevent me from reaching what I want. You do not only place the barriers in me, but yourself. You do not believe that I can do it, you tell yourself that I cannot make it, I do not have the cut for it. Subconciously, you refused to let me do what I want. The fear of me ruining myself blinded you from seeing my passion which will keep me alive. You refuse to see my passion. You always think you are right. You know I care about you a lot. You never know how pain I felt when you do not support me. You never know how many nights I cried because you disapprove of my ways. I felt demoralized, degraded. You will never know how many times I had changed my decisions because of you. . to suit you. . . to make you feel better . . Do you know why? It's uncountable. . You would never believe so. . but it's true. . I always care about you, give up my everything for you. But who cares for me? I am not perfect. I needed support . . . especially from you. But where are you? I am imperfect. . Have all the things I had gave up for you really worth it? I dunno. . Will I ever be able to live for myself and free of your shackles? Easter Sunday ____________________________________________________ Today is a great day. Somehow I felt my faith is totally renewed. This is very first time in my whole life that I could really feel Jesus's love for everyone, including me. The sacrifice that He made on the cross was really that wonderful, proclaimed by those who had experience it. "That wonderful" meaning no words could express my overwhelmed feeling. I am really grateful that I turned up for today's sunrise service (first time in my whole lifetime) and Easter service.
I am also glad that I did not fall asleep in both of today's service cos I did not sleep the last night. I was in church for my pcm's retreat the whole night. We had bbq marshmallow at 12 plus. muahahaha. Supposed to sleep at 4, but did not get to sleep. That's a story for another time. So I went up to the attic when the sky is still dark. It was quite a nice feeling having quite substantial number of God-loving people there. I was quite surprise to see Minghui there. Later on, I found out he walked from home to the sunrise service. I am soooo soo surprise. His house is not really that near to church. Anyway, there's one thing I learn today which I don't think I'll ever forget. Last time I used to wonder how come Good Friday is good when Jesus died? How can a person die be a good thing. Well, today my pastor somehow answered my question. Friday is good because Sunday is coming. My heart just melted. It's simple and true. He talked about the basis of our faith. "If Jesus died and never resurrect, what ever we do will be useless. The money we spend on church building, the time missionaries spend overseas will mount up to nothing." In my heart, I was like "True! True!". "In other religions, people are trying to do things to reach God. But in Christianity, Jesus is God's way of reaching people." I am not trying to say the bad things of other religion. But my heart really moved when this sentence was said. I guess no human will be able to love us the way God love us. His love is perfect. Headlines : Super Girl Tears Specs ____________________________________________________ My less than one-year-old specs is spoilt. I was very shocked during the process of spoiling.
(Flashback) I was getting ready to bath this morning. I dun think any normal person would wear specs to bath. So while I was taking out my specs, I felt as if I was tearing paper. The plastic at the edge simply tore.. like paper! I know I am slow. I started wondering why I have the sensation of tearing a paper. Then I examine my specs. It had lost a leg! Even though I am slow, it happened within seconds. I was soooo shocked. I can tear plastic!!  Spec : It did not tear at the hinge, but rather the plastic (End of flashback) Anyway I am quite upset, cos I really liked the specs, even though some people commented that "You looked alien", "You looked like a teacher". And it totally doesn't help when I dreamt (nightmared) of POLAR BEAR last night, when he hunted me for "parameters" before examination. Well, during the dream it was like this .... POLAR BEAR : Juvena, examinations are coming right? Me: Yes. POLAR BEAR : You know lecturers do not need to teach and mark scripts during this short period right? They are rather free. Me: Yes. POLAR BEAR : So can you give me the "parameters" during this period. Me: Okay, I'll do it. This is super scary. I haven't even started on my FYP and he started coming after me. Somemore I knew I was slow in my progress, but I need to study too. Haizzz!!! So sad right??? Haiz. Now I need to buy new specs. BABY died . . . ____________________________________________________ Just got back my English paper today. It was rather badly done. What to do? I wrote the whole paper. The marks didn't even reach a B grade. ):
I am now wondering if the rest of them have placed in more efforts, would things changed? After all I am the only non-arts student in the whole group. I also never expected that I would be the only one to write the paper all by myself. It goes like this: First meeting (after we received all the data) Intro and conclusion - Psychology Major Methodology - Me Analyse 1 - English Major Analyse 2 - No Major At the end of first draft, I edited the 3 lined intro into one paragraph intro. Analyse 1 was in table format. Since she's not a singaporean, I did all her translation and explain to her what the words meant. (My English paper is on Singlish). Last few Meetings After lecturer went throught the project question in class, we realised that we miss out on a lot of stuff and needed to revamp. But submission was coming. No Major and me started re-doing the Analyse 2. Psychology Major and English Major are supposed to do Analyse 1. But in the end, there's not much changes. And since No Major got submittion due soon, I did the Analyse 1 too. Since I did the both analyses and conclusion aint the same as previous, I gotta change them. I did the conclusion too. In the end I did the whole paper. Now the paper is back. And it's my baby, as I did the paper myself. It aint good at all. My group mates also never really counter-check for me. I just felt so sad as I thought more could be done. I thought my paper is alright, but it was worthless infront of the marker. Somemore she marked leniently. So this is very upseting. I know more things could be done, but I didn't do. Sad... But then again. If I did well, I guess I will be proud. After all it's my baby. Maybe God doesn't want me to be proud. . . He wants me to humble myself. . and take the blame? |
